Askew Angst

Kelsey Amell
My feet bring me to this one spot.
Every time.
I inch forth as if I'm being faced with
a subconscious crime.
I stare into this mirror 
and feel as if my emotions are pretty clear.
Never have I been so wrong.

Nothing becomes known. Only fogged, unclear shapes.
The silhouette of this capsule-
This vessel.
This physical prison I have become trapped within.
I pinch so hard, yet I feel not one signal of pain upon my skin.

I relentlessly attempt to skew the phantom before me. Myself.
While placing my pride upon a shit shelf.
My imagination, just rolling like pesky credits.
Nothing is passing over my skull but violent confusion.
I can't organize these words; all these names; this delusion.
My entire existence is an illusion.

Surrounded by disarray, I must always
Fix
Count
Arrange
Place
Misplace
Replace
Pick
Pry
Place
Count
Organize

Nobody can live like this!
Who lives like this?! 
Why don't you understand?!
You obviously don't care, right?.....RIGHT?!

Wait- are those people over there laughing?....
My skin is crawling....
Tell myself-
"Nobody even pays attention to the credits anyway."